Peripheral Vision: Playstation Eye

The Playstation Eye has the amazing ability to be utterly useless. Recently I purchased one alongside long-forgotten PS3 card game Eye of Judgment for a measly 1000 yen, and although I hardly feel ripped off, I can’t shake the feeling that I have simply managed to acquire another lump of plastic to make my small apartment feel even smaller. All of the positive points related to the product managed to be heavily outweighed by a negative counterpoint.

For example, the Playstation Eye has the ability to enable video chat in online games. Or at least it would if any games supported it. Oh, sorry I almost forgot about Zen Pinball… my mistake. Although, the fact that it doesn’t work for any games might be a blessing in disguise seeing as how video chat on the Xbox Live version has turned Uno from a family friendly card game into a very poor quality internet sex show.

Through clever integration with games, the experience for the user has the potential to be greatly enhanced. Burnout Paradise made clever use of the camera to take pictures of players who had been taken down, and then send them to the victor as a kind of trophy. Even discounting the vile images that could be flung your way, sadly it’s a pretty useless feature because no one actually has a Playstation Eye. There is little incentive for developers to integrate the feature into their games as they can’t count on an established user base.



Lastly, the one game which really makes interesting use of the Playstation Eye is Eye of Judgment, in which it can read data from cards and then convert that information into three dimensional images onscreen. It is an impressive feat, and although pointless, it is nonetheless something you would show off to your friends. At least it would be if the game wasn’t Eye of Judgment, a trading card game set in a fantasy world. Besides live action role playing there is little in the world that discourages romantic relationships than trading card games set in fantasy worlds.

Rockstar keep on rocking

For years the Grand Theft Auto series has been vilified by the mainstream media, politicians and parents. It seems to invite controversy and act as a lightning rod for all the fears and misgivings that people have about video games, yet who know little about them. The bullet points of events from the series when taken out of context (as they inevitably are) can be quite shocking. Leaving beside the nonsense of countless factual errors that are made when talking about the series, there are still enough things to raise the eyebrows of even the most liberal person. And I’m not going to bother naming the things that happen...oh alright just a few then.

(Deep breath) Murder, mass murder, arson, robbery, theft, casual sex, sex with prostitutes, implied gay sex, implied animal sex, pornographic movie productions, swearing, sacrilegious behavior, sacrilegious language, selling drugs, taking drugs, buying drugs, illegal use of firearms, strip clubs, full frontal male nudity… (Exhale). Just to name a few things.



Whether you like the games or hate them, you should at least attempt to appreciate just how much of a cultural impact they are having. What Grand Theft Auto has achieved in its comparatively short lifespan is comparable to decades of slow progress that was made in relation to cinema. In the last DLC pack, ‘The Lost and the Damned’, Rockstar (the studio that makes the series) showed full frontal male nudity. Their audacity, their self-confidence is incredible to attempt such a thing. Whilst they might offend the mainstream media with their depictions of violence, in this case they purposefully tried to offend the people who are their target audience; young males. That takes some balls (sorry). Whilst the player might not react to the hideous crimes their character is committing, the fact that something in a videogame can still elicit such a strong response is impressive and hopefully forced the player to question their own values.



In Grand Theft Auto San Andreas the main character was black, forcing those with racist sentiment to swallow it in order to play the game. The main character in GTA IV was an Eastern European immigrant, forcing the player to empathize with plight of people who are generally looked down upon. Now, the name of the new DLC for GTA IV has been revealed, ‘The Ballad of Gay Tony’. The response on message boards was fascinating. Many supported it, many claimed that they would refuse to buy it. Either way, Rockstar has once more pushed the boundaries of acceptability. And I promise you that no game with the word ‘Gay’ in the title will sell as many copies. Rockstar you have challenged us yet again. I salute you.

GAME bar

If you can find it, GAME is another interesting videogame bar in Shinjuku. But finding this bar is somewhat akin to finding a needle in a haystack of host bars and hostess clubs. It’s in a nine story building around the Golden Gai area near a Mister Donuts on the fifth floor with no sign outside… good luck finding it. Every other establishment in this exceedingly shady building is host or hostess related and it’s quite a shock to find this small ocean of otaku calm amongst it. Once you do get inside the decoration is hardly impressive, especially compared to the more appropriately themed 8 bit café. Its previous purpose is made abundantly clear through the small faux oak paneled bar and cabinets, leather seats and large mirror that extends across one wall.

This place is aimed squarely at those people who just want to play games with their friends. Whilst the 8-bit café invites you to drown in the comforting atmosphere of retro games, at GAME bar you play them. There are four TVs ensuring that you don’t need to wait for others before getting to play, and the mirror is covered with a crude paper screen onto which games can be displayed using a projector. There is a greater variety of consoles to play as well, and those of you who really want to have a four player match of Wii tennis can do so with minimal risk of injury. Except if you drink heavily of course, in which case all bets are off.

The drinks are pretty reasonable but rather unexotic and there isn’t much in the way of food available. Lump that with a 1000 yen table charge and it all seems pretty unappealing. However, this place has its own kind of charm generated by the friendly Master (who you can challenge if you feel confident) and the focus on playing games competitively. For those who need a little extra incentive, according to the Master quite a few of the hosts in the building like to drop by after their shift. If you ever wanted to see groups of immaculately dressed effeminate men kicking each others’ asses at Street Fighter 2, this may be your best bet.

Game Recommendations: Professor Layton and the Curious Village

Do you like charm? Do you like whimsy and adventure? Do you like testing your own mental capacity? If your answer to the above was no, then don’t worry; most DS owners agree with you. Professor Layton and the Curious Village contains all of these elements, yet the majority of people outside Japan chose not to engage in one of the most interesting portable game titles available.

In many ways it is understandable as to why many would pass it by. At its core, Professor Layton is a simple book of brainteasers that you could pick up for about a dollar. On the basis of that it seems ridiculous to justify paying up to 30 bucks for the window dressing…but seeing as this section is called game recommendations I guess I had better give it a try.



That ‘window dressing’ is in fact an integral part of the game’s appeal. From the first moment the gentlemanly Layton and his irritatingly perky assistant Luke step into the village of St. Mystere inevitably it enraptures you. If you have ever seen the French animated movie ‘Les Triplettes de Belleville’ this will feel wonderfully familiar. The game suffocates you with its charm until you are forced to submit and fall in love with it, somewhat like how I felt about Amelie. The soundtrack certainly shares a lot in common with that movie, evoking a wistful rustic feel and bringing life to the enthralling yet slightly sinister village. The gorgeous graphics are the shell of St. Mystere, but the music that reacts to the mood of the narrative breathes the soul into it.

Without spoiling the story, there are so many mysteries to uncover that you will always be looking to find the next piece of the puzzle (literally in some cases). It contains all the classic clichés such as a rich recluse dying and leaving behind a mysterious will, unexplained things that go bump in the night, murder, and a mysterious man who stalks the streets at night. The ‘action’ is occasionally punctuated by sumptuously produced cutscenes that indicated just why Studio Ghibli entrusted Level 5 with a collaborative game.



Despite all this, it is just a collection of puzzles. Is it really worth paying for the ‘window dressing’? The short answer is “yes”. The longer answer is “Yes, do it.”

wtf moments: The manga reader

Confession time; this is the first wtf moment that I have not yet experienced and the information comes from my friends. Having said that it was such a good story that I feel compelled, duty bound if you will, to pass of the story.

My friends were relaxing in Yoyogi Park enjoying a hanami (cherry blossom viewing) party. A man approached them who could charitably be described as an eccentric nomad, or more accurately called a crazy homeless guy. The service he was offering was to read manga comics to the enraptured, and slightly scared, audience for a small price. So having chipped in a couple of hundred yen each they were allowed to choose which manga they would like him to read. As there were a couple of interesting choices including Fist of the North Star, they natural asked him to read a homoerotic comic.

He then read the comic aloud, like some ancient culture’s village historian, and adopted different voices for the various characters in the story. In this case that involved the dominant alpha male whose deep voice boomed ominously, and the more submissive young man was represented by a suitably more effeminate voice. From what I was told the most impressive/intriguing/disturbing part of the experience was the gusto with which he would perform the many, many sound effects. If you have as much of an annoyingly vivid imagination as myself, I apologize if that has scarred you mentally.

So, if you happen to be lucky enough to see this vagabond wandering the streets of Tokyo, take a moment to think about whether you would like to be affected by this life-altering experience.

"The Battle for Equality!": a Final Fight 2 retrospective

More like "Final Fight For Equality!...2"

Martin Luther King once had a dream, but you can bet it was nothing like this. Whilst Capcom have been barracked in recent times for racial insensitivity in Resident Evil 5, take a step a little further into the past and you can see that they have been championing racial equality for quite some time. Kind of. “We are all the same” is a beautiful message, but in Final Fight 2 they took it a little too far.

This side scrolling beat’em up has very similar gameplay mechanics to the first one, the main difference being that whilst the first game confined the scope to cleaning thugs off the streets of Metro City, the second game was a globe trotting extravaganza. Taking in Hong Kong, France, England, Holland, Italy and Japan (for no discernable reason), the player was treated to a variety of interesting backdrops. The same cannot be said of your enemies. In Hong Kong you take on a variety of street thugs such as Schot, Mary, Alex, Eliza, Atlus, Eddie and the Andore family. In France you take on a number of enemies including Schot, Mary, Alex… huh? In Holland you tackle a number of foes like Schot…Mary…


Fact: Schot has 200 identical twin brothers around the world. Who all dress identically.

“That’s right people. No matter who you are and what you do to live, thrive, and survive we are all the same.” As the Blues Brothers said, but is this what they meant? I would like to think that Capcom was attempting to convey a powerful message to an unsuspecting audience that aimed to improve racial harmony in the future. It doesn’t matter what country you are in, or what nationality you are, we still share common values. Not only was the game attempting to eliminate racial discrimination it also had a number of political statements it wanted to make as reflected in the enemies you face. Eddie, the corrupt police officer appears in every country showing us that nowhere is free from the tyranny of authoritarianism. The leopard print dungaree wearing Andore family show that homosexuality is something to be proud of and to wear your heart on your sleeve. Mary and Eliza show the plight of women who cannot get a decent education, are forced into a life of prostitution, and then eventually turn to street crime. Powerful messages indeed.


Say it loud and say it proud Andore

I have a dream that one day the world will be like Final Fight 2. Till then, thank you Capcom for embarking with us on the long journey to this utopia.

The "never ending conversation": How to test the patience of Japanese people

Ah the brutal cycle of repetition. Combine that with the general amiability and willingness to agree of the average Japanese person and if you time it right, you too can end up in a conversation which involves simply agreeing with each other. ‘Ne’ ‘Desho’ and Desuyone’ are basically ways to say ‘right’ or ‘that’s true’ in Japanese, either as a way of checking if the other person agrees with your opinion, or as a way for the other person to show their approval or agreement with what you have just said. And as I mentioned, Japanese people love to agree with each other, meaning that a lot of conversation are based around one person stating the obvious then the other person agreeing with them (well, I guess that is applicable to most nationalities!). Here is a simple example dialogue:

“Atsui ne?” (It’s hot isn’t it?)
“Ne” (Yeah)

The great thing is that you don’t need to stop there; you can just keep on agreeing with each other for a very long time before one person decides that enough is enough. I love doing this with my friends, and I suggest you try too. See how much you can test the patience of the notoriously polite Japanese people until they crack! Try starting this one, and don’t forget that you need to keep raising your intonation in order to demand a response.

“Tanoshikata ne?” (That was fun wasn’t it?)
“Ne” (Yep, it was fun)
“Desuyone” (Yeah it kicked ass, right?)
“Hai, so desu” (I already told you it was fun)
“Desho?” (Best thing ever eh?)
“Desho” (Look, it was alright, but now you are going a bit too far)
“So dayo ne?” (Seriously, that was more awesome than…than anything ever, don’t you think?)
“….so ne.” (Woah…I got to get away from this freak)

Give it a go, kids!

Casual flirtation

The casual is a curious beast. Like some unattainable object of affection, for years the games industry has desperately flirted and charmed her in an attempt to win her over. Nintendo got the girl, and they are pretty smug about it to say the least. But now they have to hold her attention and keep her interested, a task which may prove challenging with this fickle filly. Microsoft and Sony remain on the sidelines, pimply teens trying to preen themselves and change their image into something more tantalizing. Image has always been the problem, as videogames have always been seen as immature and confusing toys. This E3 both Microsoft and Sony are set to unveil their motion sensing technology that they hope can cast them into the blue ocean that Nintendo is currently swimming in. The problem is, they just don’t understand girls…I mean casual gamers.

Image issues



Nintendo is a household name associated with family fun due to their longstanding tradition going back to the 80s. Whilst Sony and Microsoft share similar name recognition, their image has been founded on different entertainment and work devices. From simple word association pop psychology, most people would no doubt connect Sony with the Walkman and Microsoft with PCs. Importantly, for many parents nowadays they themselves grew up playing NES games making the Wii seem like a more natural fit.

Getting attention
Whilst Sony and Microsoft can flex their muscles and talk themselves till they are blue in the face, it matters little if no one is listening. On the other hand, when Oprah shows off Wii Fit on her show or Stephen Colbert plays Wii Sports on his program, a lot more potential consumers are exposed to their product. The fact that the Wii’s exterior and interface is so similar to an ipod is no accident. When their competition is so bulky and intimidating is can’t help but look sleek and sexy by comparison.

The hardcore casual



It may not even be worth getting their attention because they don’t spend anywhere near the amount of money that the hardcore are willing to put down. Casuals find something they like and are good at, and they play it almost exclusively. So whilst it is good news when Call of Duty and Madden sell through the roof, they probably don’t need any other games. Likewise whilst Warcraft can hardly be called casual considering the dedication that is required, nonetheless it has attracted non-gamers who are unlikely to play anything else. And why buy a console anyway when Steam and Popcap games are becoming more and more popular? Add to that the increasing popularity of browser based games and the hassle of buying a console seems unpalatable to many.

Motion sensing is like, so over



Nintendo has already cornered the name recognition market on motion sensing games. Sony and Microsoft’s solutions will undoubtedly be significantly superior, will the consumer notice, or even care? It may seem vital to those of us hoping for more fidelity in our Wii tennis games (although Wii Motion Plus may solve that problem) but, to misquote Sarah Palin, “will Joe six-pack give a damn”? Provided he can stop his rampant alcoholism long enough to test and compare all three consoles and their respective motion controller software, perhaps yes. Otherwise expect him to crack open a fresh one and stick with Wii bowling.

I for one am excited about the potential of superior motion controller technology. But, I am a hardcore gamer. For those beautiful sirens at which this charm offensive is squarely aimed, it may drift by them. Luckily Sony and Microsoft can always rely on those pimply teens.

"SHHIIIIIINNNNNNGGGGGOOOOO!"

When Kusanagi-kun was arrested for public indecency he stripped bare more than just his body. He also tore off the veil of the nature of celebrity in Japan. Perhaps first I should provide a little context for those who somehow missed this (old) news. At 3am on April 23rd Tsuyoshi Kusanagi of the boy band SMAP was arrested for public indecency, reportedly dancing naked and under the influence of alcohol in a park in Tokyo.

SMAP are the most popular and much beloved boyband in Japan, and whilst they rarely now release new music, each member is involved in various other acting and performing projects and they host the popular variety show SMAPXSMAP. They aren’t known as having squeaky clean images (only one is married and another is a notorious womanizer), but they are nonetheless a very respected and trusted brand in Japan. Thus the arrest led to some shockwaves around the world with even the BBC website commenting on the controversy. Kusanagi himself was forced to withdraw from some high-profile advertising campaigns and his own image has undoubtedly suffered.

SMAP were always in a curious position. Unlike almost every other boyband that has ever existed, these guys are still together after what is coming up to a twenty year career. The young idol boys’ image faded a long time ago, and yet as they have become such household names, high standards of moral integrity are still expected of them. After so long, even the member who has carved a persona as a sensitive and gentle person (which I’m sure he is) was bound to crack.

Despite that there is a lot of schadenfreude surrounding the incident, and the hilarity of the crime itself makes it irresistible. As the great man said himself when being arrested to the police, “What’s wrong with being naked?” Nothing my good man. Unless you happen to be a symbol of gentility for an entire country. Until the same thing happens to Prince William (because realistically Harry will beat him to it), we may never understand how Japanese people felt when Kusanagi-kun, stark naked in a park bellowed “SHHHHIIIINNNNNNGGGGGOOOOOOOO!”

What to expect from E3

E3 is back with a bang, or at least that is the official line. After a couple of years in which the scale and scope of the event has fluctuated dramatically to its detriment, it seems to have finally hit its stride. The spectacle is back, with all the trappings that come with it (yes booth babes are here to stay apparently), and with the economy in a tricky situation it presents the opportunity for the big three to excite and invigorate their core audience as well as courting the mainstream media. With all that in mind, Nintendo, Microsoft and Sony all need big shows but with the disappointment of last year fresh in the mind, who will pull it off?

Microsoft



Why they need a big show: Whilst their main rivals Sony have a strong 09 lineup stretching into the start of next year, Microsoft need to show that they are able to match their quality. Failure to do so would give the momentum and bragging rights to the Sony faithful.

What will they show: With Halo ODST being released this year it’s hard to imagine that we will see much of Halo 4. At least the development is likely to be confirmed and probably a very brief teaser trailer in order to grab some headlines. Don’t, however, expect the platform to be specified. Microsoft surely has their eye on the next console cycle, and whilst it may be too soon to reveal their next machine, they will want a Halo game to be released alongside it. The long, long awaited Alan Wake will probably at last be shown in a tangible form. Beyond that it’s hard to say. They have to announce new games, but as Microsoft doesn’t have many IPs to tap, perhaps we could see a number of original IPs to get tongues wagging. The motion senor controller that has been rumored for a long time is likely to be a focal point of the conference to continue their trend of trying to appeal the casual audience.

Unlikely megaton: They could mention the next Xbox, or finally dive into the handheld market. Of these two unlikely scenarios, the handheld device is more plausible, and if, as is expected, it is XBL compatible they could just steal the show.

Nintendo



Why they need a big show: Nintendo has been dominant this generation, but with sales finally showing signs of flagging they will be looking to reinvigorate the hardcore fanbase and as well to remind the casuals why they bought a Wii in the first place. After the pitiful keynote last year Nintendo has to recover some credibility.

What will they show: Nintendo has the potential to have a fantastic E3. They could show a new Mario, Zelda, Pikmin or Kid Icarus. However they also have the potential to have a disastrous E3 in which little is shown to interest their loyal fans. Either way, Nintendo have the least to lose. Their main audience probably won’t know much about E3 and hearing more about Wii Sports 2 or a Wii Fit sequel would be enough. Having said that, it is likely that at least one of their core franchises will be wheeled out as Nintendo claim that they are aiming to excite the hardcore fans at this year’s E3. On the other hand, last year Reggie revealed that Animal Crossing Wii was the ‘hardcore’ game to satisfy the fans. Fingers crossed that it is less toe curlingly embarrassing than the last one.

Unlikely megaton: Wii HD. Many analysts have suggested that it is inevitable and Nintendo do like to tweak their hardware, but usually only with handheld devices. The fact that they are unlikely to want to confuse the general public and the soon to be released Wii Motion Plus means that there probably won’t be any hardware announcements this year.

Sony



Why they need a big show: Sony is losing the console war, and whilst it shows some signs of recovery in Japan, it is still desperately lagging behind Microsoft in America. Despite them repeatedly hammering home their message that the PS3 is a great deal, at 400 dollars in the midst of an economic recession many consumers would beg to differ.

What will they show: Sony is guaranteed to have a great show having already announced the majority of their upcoming games. Expect to see more of God of War 3, MAG (along with a new name for it hopefully), Uncharted 2, Ratchet and Clank and the new team ICO game to name just a few. Unfortunately having already announced the majority of their upcoming games, there is little that could provide the shock of E3. With the leak of the PSP redesign, there seem to be no more secrets to come from Sony. With plenty of great games though, it seems likely that much of their keynote will be focused on how they have the strongest lineup of games this year and heading into next year. Also expect them to talk about Home. Again.

Unlikely megaton: A significant price drop. Analysts have predicted it, customers have waited for it and publishers have begged for it, but Sony are standing firm. Before it seemed like an inevitable necessity for their survival, but Sony look unwilling to take a massive hit on their profits after taking an economic hammering last fiscal year. The redesigned PS3 (or PS3 slim) being confirmed as genuine is another unlikely possibility.

Do you remember what you were doing 13 years ago? : A Duke retrospective

This was 1997...Lord help us...

Can you even remember what you were doing 13 years ago? Were you studying in school, ignorant of the crushing disappointments of adulthood that awaited you? Were you celebrating the birth of your first child, unaware that the innocent, helpless light of your life would grow up to be a hellion who resents you? Or were you merely a twinkle in the eye of a milkman?

If you were game development studio 3D realms, you had just started working on Duke Nukem Forever, the latest installment in a popular franchise featuring a main character that was a parody of the muscle-bound action heroes of that era. Back to the present day and on May 18th the closure of 3D realms finally ended the longest development period in videogame history without a retail product.

13 years. Never mind videogames, think how much society, culture, history has changed in that time. There are many lists of events that have happened since the announcement of this game and I suggest you have a look yourself, but here are a few highlights I picked out (thanks to ign.com):

The Harry Potter franchise
MySpace
9/11
The George Bush years including the Iraq war
The first black President of the United States of America
The Voyager 1 spacecraft has traveled 14 billion kilometers from Earth
The Xbox
The new Star Wars Trilogy
Pokemon released outside Japan
Approximately 509,380,000 people have died and 661,380,000 people have been born

The Beatles entire career was shorter than the development cycle of this game, as were both World War I and World War II.

To say that the game would have been outdated is somewhat of an understatement. The character of Duke is a crude parody of the Arnold Schwarzenegger cigar chomping, wife-beater vest wearing, wisecracking misogynistic action hero that even at the time was a declining trend in contemporary cinema. Arnold is now governor of California. Seeing as the closest thing to a modern day action hero is Vin Diesel, kids today simply don’t have a cultural point of reference.



Oh, and thirteen years ago Sonic the Hedgehog games were still good. Time can be so cruel.

wtf moments: Host clubs

Ah, hosts. Those denizens of the night. Those princes of Shibuya. Those perfectly coiffured sharks of the Tokyo night. For those new to Japan, you might wonder just why on earth there are groups of impossibly manicured men populating the streets of Tokyo. Sure, the Japanese have a somewhat legendary status as being fashion conscious, but these guys just take it way beyond the next step. Somewhere beneath the three feet of hair that has been meticulously stylized, sits the perma-tan and the sparkling white teeth. There may or may not be an attractive man underneath all that, but like the most skillfully made up women, its pretty hard to tell.

What do they do? Well they do the same job as hostesses. For those who don’t know what they do, I’m sure I will do a separate article at some point. Basically hosts are paid to talk to women. If that isn’t a wtf moment I’m not sure what is. This is why they constantly strive for physical perfection. They are paid large sums of money to chat to ladies, compliment them, and listen to any problems or grievances they might have. And they get paid an awful lot to do it. Oh, and in case you thought it might be all old biddies with more money than sense, you’d be wrong. Apparently a large number of the customer base for hosts are…hostesses. Because their job finishes late, they have to spend time with unattractive old men, and they have a lot of disposable income, hostesses like to go to host bars. So in fact some of the most beautiful women in Japan are paying you to talk to them… WTF?!?!



Before you all rush out to slap on some fake tan and hit the gym though, it would be wise to note that like hostess clubs, host clubs are intrinsically linked with the criminal underworld. But, come one, for this job it’s almost worth the risk.

“The candy bar that cleans teeth!”: games aren't enough

"Buy a PS3 today and you also get a Blu-ray player!"

Like a Troy McClure infomercial, consoles have for a long time seen the need to provide something a little extra. Being ‘just a videogame console’ is no longer enough. Now we are presented with ‘entertainment hubs’, ‘media centers’ and other buzzwords that essentially boil down to muscle flexing and an extra point on the back of the box. Having said that, on rare occasions the PR blurb actually represents a feature that changes how consoles are perceived, or provides real additional value for your purchase. The following provides just a few highlights of the more successful console features, and some of the more amusing failures of our ‘living room lifestyle enablers’.

Movie players

The good: PS2 and PS3
Congratulations Sony, your machines are actually good for something. It’s just a shame it’s not playing games! Ohh burn! Cough. Sorry about that. Actually I love my Playstations but its no secret that the success of the PS2 relied heavily on the public being informed that it was also a DVD player. The public didn’t really care about DVDs. Then they saw the Matrix DVD being demoed on a PS2 and realized that they had to get rid of their painstakingly acquired VHS collection. The jump from VHS to DVD was incredible. The clarity and fidelity that was made possible by the switch to the disc format made even the most casual movie buff consider re-buying the entire collection. Likewise the PS3 is known as a fairly cheap and decent Blu-ray player which is updatable. The only problem is that unless you have a high definition TV, they look pretty much the same as DVDs. Seeing as everyone re-bought their entire movie collection the last time, it is proving a bit tougher to make the hard sell a second time, especially when the digital distribution future is getting closer and closer.


Remember when this was the greatest thing in the world? You know, before the second and third movies came out

The bad: Xbox 360 and Wii
The 360 went for HD-DVD over Blu-ray. How did that work out for them? Not too well. The Betamax of our generation was left in the annuals of failure and a few pissed off 360 owners were left with a format that was obsolete. Not that it really matters because playing movies on a 360 is like trying to watch a movie with a helicopter taking off in the background. Netflix has saved it to some extent, but the volume problem still remains. The Wii’s DVD integration? Oh that’s right, it didn’t have it. It only gets a mention because there was talk of an updated console that featured DVD playback…if you want to go so ghetto, why not just have VCD playback?

The ugly: The Dreamcast
Oh, because the Dreamcast did it first…

Social networks

The good: Xbox360
The most complete and well thought out of all the consoles in terms of social networks, Microsoft are pretty up on this stuff due to their PC background. Online was always a priority for them in the console market too as the original Xbox sowed the seeds of what XBL has become today. Constantly being refined and managing to stay one step ahead of the competition, the key appeal of the 360 (the only one besides Halo) is the strength of community that it creates, in particular the birth of achievements. They alone were a stroke of genius. To be able to compare them to your friends, that was the icing on the cake.

The bad: PS3
Home. Loathe it or… be indifferent to it. Well recently Sony has actually managed to turn this lumbering white elephant into something of some value, but it was a long time coming and no one is sure if it was worth the wait. Despite all the new excellent features that have been integrated into Home, it is still essentially one big advertisement in which you have to pay ridiculous fees to dress your soulless avatar in branded goods. So, just like real life then. Finally, finally there might be something on the horizon, but for those who downloaded Home, danced for 10 minutes and then deleted it, it may be too little too late.


Just...just terrible

The ugly: Wii
Friend codes; effective at preventing contact with pedophiles and your friends. Get back in the plastic bubble little boy.

The ugliest: The Dreamcast
A 56k modem should be used only to look at web pages that featured black and white text. And then crash. It should not be used to play games on. It was into this cruel world that the Dreamcast launched, a console ahead of its time that in no way could live up to its bold claims. Rest in peace little buddy.

The Elephant Cafe

The Elephant Café is another trendy chain of restaurants in Japan, focusing on an Asian style dining experience. Whilst the food itself draws from a number of different sources of inspiration, the décor is largely reflective of Thai culture. Depending on the restaurant the décor changes slightly, but whilst the food is by and large excellent, it does suffer somewhat from being too ‘atmospheric’.

To put it another way, it’s dark. Not so dark that you grope blindly around hoping to grasp your drink rather than another patron’s hand, but dark enough for spineless types like myself to feel a little oppressed. Combine that with the unwillingness to crank up the air conditioning and you have recreated the famous Thai humidity perfectly, at a small cost to the comfort of the customer and a general feeling of drowsiness. From another, less pedantic point of view it does create a nicely intimate and romantic atmosphere.

There is a 3500 yen set course including nomihoudai and the real surprise is the quality of the food. Considering that many restaurants seem content to wheel out the less appetizing aspects of their menu in such deals, the Elephant Café provides a delicious and complete set menu, though the variety of the food is somewhat questionable. For example, three of the courses served featured shrimp with salad. Each was prepared and tasted differently, yet it does feel as though more effort could have been taken in providing a more diverse palate. Again, having said that, the food is excellent and plentiful meaning that you bound to leave as a satisfied customer. The set course drinks menu didn’t include beer, but surprisingly included things like whisky. The staff are friendly and accommodating, but perhaps due to the popularity of the place the service can be a little slow.

Overall the Elephant Café provides an excellent dining experience, and depending on your preference, is a charming and intimate restaurant. With food that is above the usual standard for such chains and being undeniably trendy (it occasionally hosts club events) it is worth checking out. However, those with poor vision though may want to reconsider.

A legacy picked clean: a Dreamcast retrospective

What does this list of names mean to you?
Sonic Adventure, Powerstone, Shenmue II, Virtua On, Marvel Vs Capcom 2, Grandia II, Seaman, Soul Calibur, Samba De Amigo, House of the Dead II, Sega bass Fishing, Skies of Arcadia, ChuChu Rocket, Dead or Alive II, Ikaruga, Space Channel 5, Crazy Taxi, Virtua Tennis 2, Phantasy Star Online, Resident Evil Code Veronica…I could go on but I think you get the point.

For people like myself who proudly owned a Dreamcast, these are just some of the games that defined the wonderful and sadly all too short lifespan of Sega’s last and greatest console. For all the people who leapt onto the sinking ship (which obviously wasn’t enough) few regretted their ill-fated purchase and continue to wax lyrical through rose-tinted spectacles about the ‘best console.’ But that argument is for another time. This is how the legacy of the console was picked clean by the vultures following the death of the Dreamcast.



Take another look at that list. Whilst it represents some of the finest games to appear on the platform, it is also a list of games that went on to feature on other consoles. The main beneficiaries were the Playstation 2, Xbox and Gamecube, but ports also appeared on the GBA (ChuChu Rocket), PSP (Powerstone and Crazy Taxi), and even the Wii has hosted recent versions of Samba De Amigo and House of the Dead. Originally I intended this list to be about the top five games that exclusively appeared on Dreamcast, but there is little left. With the recent XBLA release of Virtua On, one of the last Dreamcast franchises has gone multi-platform.

Whilst there were a lot of interesting games that were never ported, in my mind merely a holy trinity of greats were never directly ported; Shenmue, Jet Grind Radio and Cosmic Smash. However, even in the case of two these games, subsequent iterations appeared on other consoles.



Rather than lament the dilution of the Dreamcast’s legacy, we should celebrate that it managed to reach people who wouldn’t have had the opportunity to experience it otherwise. However, it is not without a tinge of regret that former Dreamcast owners look back on what could have been had the ‘six billion player’ console really taken off.

Christon Cafe: the Christian themed restaurant

For those looking for an special dining experience and can handle the ridiculously sacrilegious décor, Christon Café is an interesting place to go. As the name might imply, however much you may not want it to, Christon Café is a Christian themed restaurant. In fact the interior comes off more as Roman Catholicism meets an upscale discothèque with more than a hint of gothic. There are all the trappings of a Cathedral such as alters, stained glass windows, elaborate renaissance era wall paintings, gargoyles, and even papal robes but also leather sofas, elegant glass furniture and a disco ball. It is unusual to say the least, and for many downright offensive but at least it is a somewhat unique setting.

The theme extends pervades the restaurant. One example being that the menu on each table is stored within a Christon Café ‘Bible’. Oddly enough they seemed to show some restraint when it comes to the menu. Despite searching for religiously named food or drinks the only one I came across was the ‘Tower of Babel Beef Carpaccio’. The food itself is excellent, liberally borrowing from Italian and French cooking but providing interesting twists with the presentation. The combination of the Italian dressing with shrimp and mayonnaise served in a glass mounted with pineapple slices was surprisingly successful. The aforementioned Carpaccio was also very good, but hardly subtle. One thing likely to catch many customers unaware is that the portions are larger than perhaps you would imagine, so bear that in mind when ordering, as well as the fact that most of the courses seem to come with salad.

As befitting the trendy nature of the establishment, the staff are helpful but rarely drop their lucid demeanor, and there is a dress-code, but it isn’t especially strict, mainly enforced to keep out school kids or those who dare trying to enter wearing flip-flops. It is definitely worth visiting at least once as a point of interest, and the soft-glow lighting and ambient vibe might really appeal to you. There is one in Shibuya and one in Shinjuku so, if you don’t fear an afterlife of damnation, you might want to experience what the Vatican would be like if it was transformed into an up-market disco bar.

Momo Paradise aka 'the food of the Gods'

If you like meat and alcohol, and consuming vast quantities of both for a relatively cheap price, then I can’t recommend Momo Paradise highly enough. This charmingly, and slightly misleadingly, named restaurant chain serves shabu shabu and sukiyaki. Shabu shabu is simply thin strips of raw beef or pork dipped into boiling water and shaken gently until cooked (shabu shabu is meant to be the sound created by this action). Sukiyaki is more of a sweet stew containing beef, tofu and vegetables and the meat is dipped in raw egg prior to consumption. Both are very delicious.

For only 1680 yen you can get tabehoudai (all you can eat) for 90 minutes of either, and a few other variations. For an extra 1500 yen nomihodai (all you can drink) of alcoholic or soft drinks is also included, as well as tabehoudai for rice and vegetables. In addition to this very low price, once you have been to the restaurant they will provide you with a business card that entitles you to get a 10% discount on all future visits, or a free desert. So bearing in mind that it cost around 3000 yen for all you can eat and drink, there really aren’t many better deals out there. And in my humble opinion, shabu shabu is the food of the Gods.

Despite how busy they are the staff are frightening cheerful and friendly, admirable indeed in a restaurant which is essentially serving gluttons. Service is excellent and due to the fact that the food has been prepared in advance, you rarely have to wait longer than a minute or so before you can continue your quest for obesity.

Of course because it is such a good deal, inevitably Momo is very busy, particularly on weekends and you are strongly advised to book in advance if you don’t want a long wait. There are plenty of branches of this chain restaurant around Tokyo, so do a little research to find out where your closest one is. They also have special deals with karaoke bars and bowling alleys around the area, so if you can stomach the idea of actually moving around having gorged yourself, you can do so as part of a cheap package.

Cheap, delicious, good service and as much alcohol as you can manage; Momo is one of my favorite restaurants in Japan. But be under no illusions, it is a fast track to severe weight gain unless you are willing to burn off the meat with some guilt-induced exercise.

Momo Paradise website

The 8-bit Cafe

The 8 Bit café is actually already pretty renowned amongst the gaijin otaku community in particular, thanks to articles from websites such as Kotaku. As such it may seem initially quite underwhelming depending on your expectations. Located in a pretty shabby building above a lingerie store and photography gallery, initially you will probably notice that it is quite small and there is only one television on which to play games. However the charm of this establishment soon grows on you, with its friendly atmosphere and interesting décor.

The main premise of the bar is that you can play retro videogames, and their range of games and retro consoles is very impressive. They have almost every console you can remember that predates the Playstation 2, and a few that you may never have heard of too. The Super Famicom and NES are the real stars of the show though, and there will undoubtedly be a few classics that you will be desperate to get your hands on once you flick through the selection. The other consoles can be hooked up with the owner’s permission, but strangely enough playing videogames doesn’t even seem to be the main appeal of the place.

Instead much of the appeal comes from the décor and atmosphere. The music played is mainly remixed game songs from the 8 bit era and scattered around the bar are a collection of game and manga curios that are fascinating to pick through. I for one had never actually held a Power Glove in my hand before I visited here. Besides gaming memorabilia there is a wide selection of manga to read, some board games to play, notebooks for scribbling in to leave your mark, and of course a wide variety of drinks, and a snack focused food menu. There are a few game-themed drinks, and I can heartily recommend the Dr Mario cocktail, if only for its very suspicious presentation.



The staff are also very friendly and welcoming, and it’s clear from the clientele that frequent the 8 bit café that many are regulars who come for the atmosphere rather than specifically to play games. As a few words a caution, whilst it isn’t incredibly expensive, it’s not that cheap either. You are also required to order a drink at least once every ninety minutes (not a problem for most I imagine) but drunken behavior is strongly discouraged and you will be ejected from the premises for exhibiting it.

Like many others before me, I can highly recommend the 8 bit café. After all, how many places can you drink, smoke, play Yoshi’s Egg and listen to the Mega Man 2 soundtrack at the same time? Exactly.

Follow the link for the 8 bit café including a map
The 8-bit Cafe website

An open letter to Japan re: Evangelion

“Dear Japan,
I know that you really loved Evangelion, but it’s been fifteen years now; its time to move on. Yes I know that it was groundbreaking (as well as heartbreaking) at the time, and yes it redefined for many what the medium represented and was capable of, but it is time to let go. So why then do I still see Evangelion merchandise clogging up the shelves of every figure shop in Japan, spreading rather than receding like creeping ivy, suffocating all before it? Why do the crowds mass round the cosplaying Reis and Asukas with such fervor so long after its release?
Like a guy in his mid-thirties who hasn’t been able to get over a high school crush, the passion for Evangelion burns strongly in the heart of Japan. Its time to leave the past where it belongs and let the healing process begin.
Do not misunderstand me Japan, for I love Evangelion too. I too was enthralled by the emotionally crippled and complex characters and the tension that resulted from their enforced relationships. However, its time to take that step out of pubescent angst and into the frightening world of adulthood.
I fear this is an empty plea, likely to be lost amongst the karaoke booths that still pump out the theme tune night after night at a deafening decibel level. Unless you are a religious person, there is nothing as omnipresent as Evangelion. From the cans of soft drinks you imbibe, to the UFO catchers, to the costume of every third cosplayer you see, Evangelion is everywhere.
Please Japan, for the sake of the both of us. It’s over.”



Facts about Evangelion
30% of Japan’s economy is related to the success of the Evangelion franchise
The average Japanese man thinks about Ayanami Rei once every six seconds
10/10 people know the Evangelion franchise
5/10 people spend at least 50% of their annual salary on Evangelion goods
1/10 people are currently attempting to build their own life-sized and fully functional Evangelion
2/10 people are currently attempting to build their own life-sized and fully functional Ayanami Rei robot
(N.B. These facts are not factual)

Is the Wii dead?

Ming wants Wii dead

With Wii sales finally slowing down in Japan every hack, pundit and fanboy has taken to aiming a good solid kicking in the Wii’s direction. Nintendo have apparently lost the plot, dropped the ball, slipped up and fallen behind in the console war and it is hard to read such articles without the accompanying mental image of Ming the Merciless cackling away into a crystal ball whilst screaming ‘I told you so!’
So pushing past the hyperbole, is the Wii dying? Well of course I can’t provide a definite answer (my crystal ball is currently on the blink) but looking at various aspects of the current situation we can reasonably analyze the situation and draw some likely conclusions. Or at least spout nonsense in an authoritative manner.

Dying – Everyone already owns a Wii
Ahh saturation point, the phrase that bring Nintendo executives out in a cold sweat. As we saw with the DS, the problem, if it can be called a problem, is that everyone, their mother and their mother’s dog already has one. In Japan apparently half the population has a DS. The other half probably haven’t developed motor skills, are suffering from senility or don’t have electricity. With handheld consoles the answer has been to release improved iterations of the same hardware. The DS for example is already on its third iteration, and each one has just enough interesting features to make consumers consider upgrading. Look at the bloody ipod; if you listed every different model there has been then… well I don’t know… but I guess there are quite a few. It just doesn’t work as well for consoles. The whole reason most people upgrade is in order to show off (“You have the ipod nano? How quaint”) and to show something off it needs to be portable. Consoles sit stubbornly under your TV and only by holding countless dinner parties can you hope to impress/irritate your acquaintances. Whilst there have been mutterings about a Wii HD it is unlikely to have as much impact as, say, a DS with three cameras!

Not Dying – Everyone already owns a Wii
Nintendo won. Maybe the console might be replaced a little sooner than its competitors, but in terms of overall sales, game over man. Sony and Microsoft are left squabbling in the dust whilst Nintendo swan off into the distance on a boat made of cash. Not only have they sold more than anyone else, but from the beginning every console sold was profit for Nintendo. Even at 600 dollars Sony was losing money on each system sold so it’s understandable that they are desperately trying to avoid dropping the price any further. Microsoft can swallow the losses, but they are losses nonetheless. Nintendo can easily drop the price in the future if they need to and then maybe the three people who don’t yet own one will finally decide to pick one up.


ipod: Gotta catch them all!

VERDICT: NOT DYING

Dying – There is no quality software on the horizon
Where is a new Mario? Where is a new Zelda? Where the hell is a new franchise (it’s been a while)? Part of the analysts bleak predictions for Wii hinge on the fact that there isn’t really that much to get excited about. Even Iwata and Reggie have been scathing about their own platform’s software at times. This E3 seems to have taken on a greater significance than before due to the fact that everyone one is expecting something big from Nintendo. Giving hardcore gamers Animal Crossing again will cause a riot. Bring back Wii Music and watch journalists vent their scorn online. Just showing Wii Sports 2 for the whole of the presentation is likely to inflict despair on the Nintendo faithful. They need something new and they need something big.

Not Dying – Wii Sports 2
Everyone will buy this game, thus producing more money for Nintendo than a herd of elephants laying golden eggs. The legs on Nintendo software have proven to be ridiculously long and voluptuous. Oh and slap ‘Mario’ in the title of any old junk (Mario Party 8, Mario Super Sluggers) and watch it sell a million units.

VERDICT: NOT DYING


The fate of Nintendo rests in their hands...

Dying – Motion controls are a fad
As was often predicted by naysayers, doombringers and other biblical figures, the Wii is a fad which people are bound to get tired of. After all, how many games of Wii bowling can you stomach before you finally decide to go outside and do the real thing?

Not Dying – Wiimotion plus
This is a trickier one. The Wii owners are far less predictable than their hardcore 360 and PS3 compatriots. The latter are guaranteed to pick up certain software, giving hyped games usually a strong opening month of sales. Wii gamers don’t feel the need to buy the latest software straight away and whilst they give a lot of games long tails, it is hard for retailers to tell exactly which ones are worth sticking with.
The light at the end of the tunnel? Wiimotion plus. This could finally give us the realistic sword fighting that we dreamed of when the Wii was first unveiled. It could reinvent the way we play games. It could actually give us what Nintendo promised us in the first place. The hard part is convincing the general public to buy a device which would give them what they thought they already had.
But is motion control dead? Judging from the rumors, not if Sony and Microsoft have something to say about it…

VERDICT: NOT DYING…MAYBE

Geek Chic: How Uniqlo brought otaku clothing to the masses

From being a fairly generic clothing store based around the concepts of simplicity and affordability (think GAP but cheaper) recently Uniqlo has evolved itself to the premiere choice of otaku clothing. Many of us first heard of their new direction when the release of Metal Gear Solid 4 coincided with t-shirts based on the game being sold in Uniqlo stores. However that was just one stage in a push towards bringing geek chic to the mainstream. Before Uniqlo’s initiative, the only places you could easily find anime or gaming themed t-shirts were in small, dedicated stores or in anime merchandise stores like animate. Fairly expensive and targeted squarely at a receptive audience, they could achieve only limited success. The largest company selling such clothing was COSPA, and they also specialized in cosplay costumes thus alienating the mainstream appeal of such merchandise.

With Uniqlo’s new emphasis on anime and gaming clothes, they finally burst into the mainstream and gave that brand a personality it had been lacking. The subjects for the t-shirts have been well chosen, with the more mainstream consumer being enticed with the nostalgic appeal of Dragonball, Fist of the North Star and Hajime no Ippo. It is somewhat akin to wearing a Hero Turtles or ThunderCats t-shirt in that even if you weren’t a fan, chances are everyone recognizes the series. On the other hand more obscure, otaku targeted t-shirts based on series like Love Hina, Gyakuten Saiban and Densha de Go! appeal strongly to fans that see them as a must purchase item. Combine that with an impulse buy price of 1500 yen and it is obvious why they have proved to be so popular.



The designs of the t-shirts themselves are also intelligently arranged, with some going for obvious depictions of the subject matter, but for those that want to be a little more subtle in their display of affection for a brand, there are more abstract designs too; a small Mega Man energy bar displayed on the chest is one such example.

Whilst Uniqlo should be applauded for their business acumen and expansion of geek chic, the problem remains that is true of all mass produced clothing. Someday, sometime you are certain to run into someone else wearing the same t-shirt as you.

Otakupedia: idol otakus

Have you ever taken pleasure from gardening? Do you enjoy the thought of nurturing a young sapling and seeing it evolve and eventually bloom into a beautiful flower? Have you then idolized said flower, bought all the CDs it releases, gone to all its live performances and extolled the virtues of wearing glasses to it through writing letters? If so then you must be a local idol otaku. This very convoluted metaphor came about from asking my friend (harikiriroman, whose blog can be found in the links) to explain the appeal of local Japanese idols. As I understand it, the idol otakus run a series of complex emotions as the course of the career of their object of devotion changes. Here is a five step guide to being an idol otaku.

1. Choose your idol – This step seems to be the easiest one. There are hundreds of wannabe starlets who appear in small event spaces around Akihabara, or perform on the streets of Tokyo. You just keep going to them until you find one you like. It is vitally important to find someone who hasn’t yet garnered a big following, and has yet to establish themselves. After all, you are aiming for the position of ‘number 1 fan’.

2. Establish connection with the idol – Not nearly as difficult as you would think. If they have yet to achieve any popularity, they will be desperate to gather a dedicated fanbase. As such they can often be seen handing out flyers for their own event. Usually after performances they will be more than willing to chat and pose for photographs in order to instill a sense of loyalty and intimacy with their fans.

3. Promote them tirelessly – This is why they are so keen to attract a core base. The idol otakus are fanatical promoters of their pop princesses, often dragging along other idol otakus to compare, contrast, and hopefully win them over to the cause. It’s not enough for you to love them, everyone else must realize their genius, but the true pride comes from being the one to ‘discover’ them.

4. Dance like a madman – For those who have never seen a true idol otaku dance, think Bez from the Happy Mondays. Only more energetic. For those who don’t know who that is, imagine someone having an epileptic fit.

5. See your girl soar to stardom, or fade into obscurity (and be miserable either way) – Sadly no matter how the career of your choice of idol goes, you are unlikely to be any happier. If she becomes famous, then you become just another fan, wrestling with other devotees for some attention. If she fails and gives up her career as a local idol then she will no longer pose for your pictures and feign interest in you. Either way the only thing you can do is pick yourself up, brush yourself down, and start looking for the next little sapling to devote yourself to.

Recommended reasearch: Akihabara Donkihote on the weekend